#4 The Snow Just Gets Heavier
When you are with the right person is a label important to you? The concept of a label on a relationship is either important or limiting, or generally could just mean nothing to you. If a label in a relationship is only important to someone because it makes them feel secure, is that really a good reason? Personally, I think it is nice to feel secure but you don't need the label, or pictures online, you just need the person to make you feel like you're in a good relationship. No games or gimmicks. You shouldn't need a label to feel secure, you should just feel secure generally! Trust is a huge part of a relationship!
If a label seems limiting to someone, why? Do they think having a partner is limiting?
What I believe is that people who believe having calling someone your partner or girlfriend/boyfriend is "limiting" then it is either because they don't want to "tied down" or because their past relationships made them afraid of committing. Sometimes people are content in their relationships then once the label of "girlfriend/boyfriend" specifically pops up, they "chicken" out of the relationship. That is when they have to work on themselves. Why do they get anxious about the word? Is their past trauma coming back to hurt them?
When speaking to a friend, Nora, about this she stated how once she gets called "girlfriend" she grows a lot of anxiety in a relationship. I believe that the world "girlfriend" specifically gives people a lot of trauma, especially after horrible relationships! Same with boys who get emotionally or mentally triggered by the word "boyfriend." It is up to them to find an alternative word like "partner" or "significant other," as well as work through their past trauma.
Now, we get into Mr. Snow. When asked Snow about why he thinks people get suddenly bothered by the label of a relationship, he was very forward with saying that labels limit people's relationships. As he spoke it made me realize... a lot of men who are scared of commitment, or believe labels are limiters, often had relationships that made them more insecure as a partner. Especially for people who need to work on their life in general.
Insecurities are a part of life, and of course they will take their toll in relationships, but you have to work through them in order to be happy in your lifetime. Everyone, including Snow, has to figure what they want from a relationship. Snow has plenty to work through, but someone definitely made him feel as though he was selfish and it has impacted that way he views relationships in general. It is sad to see when you know that person is so genuinely passionate about aspects of life, but can't be the same way when it comes to love.
While I asked him this question about labels, he got more into talking about growing in a relationship. He believes you'll either grow together or grow apart, which is true out of any relationship or friendship. But, what he doesn't seem to grasp is the fact that people are always growing and changing for themselves, not for a partner.
Growing in life and achieving your life goals is how you live. Having the right person to watch you grow and support you is just something you are gifted with along the way, not something you should necessarily be searching for.
What do you think?
Post a Comment